Hey, been a while. I’m adrift again people. Again. I don’t really want to talk about it but I feel like that nerd in high school who gets bullied into writing some jerk’s AP English paper and then threatened with getting their butt kicked if they ever tell anyone. It’s complicated. (It’s actually not. It’s exactly like that.) But I tell ya, if I manage to pull a Good Will Hunting (“Because f*ck him, that’s why.”) and actually weather all this nonsense and stick around and make something of myself in spite of the mean, spoiled kids, and the duplicitous “overachievers”, and the transactional (wink, wink, nudge, nudge) relationship-line-crossers, one day I may actually have a book in me. So. Many. Characters. Anyway, maybe I won’t do that at all. Maybe I’ll pack it in and go back home. But I doubt it. Because f*ck him, that’s why. And because I can see the outcomes that are ahead. And I want to be here for them. Maybe that’s a terrible reason and makes me a horrible person. But I want to be around for them when they come. And I want to sit and read about them, or see them on social media, and drink a beer, and know that some truths are unavoidable. You will reap what you sow. I’d like to see the reaping. And I will smile.
Just watched the O’s — well, followed the action online — come back in a truly stunning game to win Game #2 in the ALDS playoffs. It sometimes feels like I’m cheating on the Braves but they will always be my guys in the postseason when they go. Anyway, The Orioles look really, really good. I don’t write the Tigers off just yet — this series will go longer than 4 games I expect — but the O’s are playing like gods. It makes me happy.
Makes sense to me. Psychologists have discovered that if you’re a jerk, you expect the world to behave like jerks. I’ve recently had a little issue with that truth pop up. I’ll be avoiding those peeps in the future. They’re a little dangerous.
Just had a pretty good talk with a guy friend of mine about this. I’ve lived with boyfriends. I wouldn’t do it again without an engagement ring. My friend agreed (!) Just seems like a good way to get lost in what is ultimately the illusion of commitment. Also, I do think it puts pressure on a married couple to live together first. I don’t care what the recent research says.
Ha, pretty much. What a dirtbag.
Okay I’m going home. I’m tired and I want my dog. Maybe football tomorrow will make things seem a little brighter. Every day’s a new day right? Y’all be good.