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Archive for January, 2013

UPDATE: Now with fixed links!

So much to share with you kids today so let me see if I can knock it out before sending around a late afternoon news release on SEC rulemaking on disclosure. Don’t be jealous…

So, Fringe is entertaining. There are moments it’s a little liberal with the unbelievable plot devices but the science is cool and the special effects are fun. And Josh Jackson has this neck that I want to do things to…But Babylon 5 has to be next on the list according to a co-worker or I’m missing out on the greatest show ever to have graced the airwaves…

My friend Charles and I talk politics throughout the day. Hazard of having the news on in my office in front of my face, telling me the dirt for 8 hours. Charles listens to talk radio. So, naturally, there are chat boxes randomly popping up with declarative statements like, “Oh for f*ck’s sake…” Today, because I know Charles listens to Glenn Beck, the following conversation occurred. Now, no disrespect intended toward Stewart, who is sometimes funny and on the money in my opinion, but this piece was just egregiously beneath respect. Full disclosure: I had a nice long chat last week with a Daily Show producer who was interested in having one of our experts on to discuss this story. Off the record, I gave him our approach to the issue of corporate personhood etc. Oddly, I think I actually made inroads. But the Big Boss just doesn’t seem too jazzed to be interviewed officially by them and I think it’s because their preferred level of discourse is…well, you can see how Charles and I characterize it below. Suffice to say, if it makes people dumber or encourages them to protect their misinformed prejudices, we’re probably not into it.

Charles: Right
Ha, so the White House’s statement on the shrinking of the GDP was “Well, there’s more than one way to measure the economy.”
Sure, that’s only the most widely used and comprehensive one
It’s probably not important
me: pay no attention to the man behind the curtain
with the data
so, what do you make of this
http://www.thedailyshow.com/watch/tue-january-29-2013/america-2–now-with-more-freedom—glenn-beck-s-utopia
10:11 AM Charles: Typical Daily Show
Strawmen and sleight of hand
me: i was gonna say
it reminds me of our chat from last night [on religion and atheists’ tendency to only debate Westboro Baptist Church types and not actual scholars or apologists who know anything]
they never go up against a clip that is actually thought provoking
just silly ones talking about french fries
10:12 AM Charles: Well, you noticed that they pieced together clips from like four different years
me: yeah
i did
and i always get the impression that Jon Stewart resorts to pure mockery with Beck
Charles: Well that’s exactly what it is
me: because he can’t actually argue the facts with him
Charles: Right
Also
10:13 AM Beck never said anything about central planning
The town he was talking about is sort of a Galt’s Gulch
The picture was an imagination of what it would look like, not a blue print
10:14 AM But again, that doesn’t matter
me: yeah, Beck gets a little mouth foamy for me sometimes
but most of these guys do
doesn’t mean they’re wrong
also doesn’t mean i don’t agree with much of what they think
and at least the effort to conceive of a better future is there
10:15 AM rather than an effort to just mock and carry out your own little vendetta
i mean, if you’re going to apply your talents, i gotta say, Beck impresses me more
even if Stewart is funnier
Charles: Right
10:16 AM me: but bread and circuses man
Charles: And honestly, all the frothing at the mouth stuff
That’s a tiny minority of what Beck does
But that gets all the press
If you don’t listen to the radio show, you should
It’s goddam hilarious
me: oh yeah i have
10:17 AM i know it’s good
my problem with Beck to the extent i have one
is my problem with Malkin, O’Reilly, et al
it’s really a personality thing
not an issue thing
Charles: Right
me: but that’s true of anyone other than yourself for most people
10:18 AM i gravitate more toward the highly intellectual
thomas sowell, mark steyn, david mamet
it’s just a preference
but they rub others the wrong way
so, it’s more style than substance
and i think that’s why Stewart irritates me
Charles: Well Steyn and Mamet are also funny
10:19 AM me: they are
just super nerdy funny
but back to stewart
he mistakes style with substance
it’s like making fun of the nerdy super genius in the back of the math class
because he wears his pants too short
10:20 AM or the cheerleader who’s quite nice
Charles: Right
me: because she has big boobs and says dumb things
it’s really nasty
and the whole time i get the funny feeling that stewart himself has probably experienced what that feels like
and that makes it worse
10:21 AM Charles: Could be
me: i mean i’m sure he’s been made to feel stupid and under-informed because he’s JUST a comic
Charles: Right
me: you’d think he’d have a little empathy
but no, he eviscerates
Charles: Right
10:22 AM What bothers me is that there’s just no talent in that
Anyone can take clips out of context
Say that people said things that they didn’t
And then make goofy faces at the camera
me: yeah, that’s true too
it’s like culling together the worst random candid photographs
and being like
10:23 AM this person is ugly!
Charles: Right
It’s like Bush-is-dumb jokes
Or blonde jokes
There’s no one who can’t do it
10:24 AM But people eat that shit up
Because they like feeling superior
me: right
and it’s easy
10:25 AM so they don’t have to actually WORK to feel superior
they don’t have to DO ANYTHING
to feel superior to Beck when Stewart presents him like a mugging buffoon
they can sit on their asses, on their couches, being wastes
and be like
“that guy’s an idiot. Make me a turkey pot pie!”
10:27 AM Charles: That’s pretty much how it goes down
10:28 AM Christopher Hitchens was on Bill Maher’s show once
And Maher was doing his usual “Bush is dumb” schtick
me: brilliant as usual, i’m sure
Charles: And the audience was eating it up of course
10:29 AM And Hitchens was like “It’s funny to me. People enjoy laughing at these jokes and feeling like they’re smarter than the president, but there’s likely no one in here that is actually smarter than the president.”
me: boom.
which is why, despite some of my abject disagreements with Hitch
I always respected him
10:30 AM did the morons stop laughing
or laugh harder?
10:33 AM Charles: They actually started booing
And which point Hitch gave them all the finger
10:34 AM me: hahahaha!
excellent. now see, THAT’s funny

Alright then, other things…

This one’s for the parents. Look what I did…

A game of tag for 23 years. Fantastic.

Included for the word “judgy.” Also, because hahahahaha!

A few words about a fascinating company. I’m serious, studying their business model and their decisions has become something of an obsession for me…

I’m told this is a must read.

Um…okay sure.

Kenny Powers follows Kia on Twitter. And I’m looking forward to them expanding Vine past Apple. I have a feeling we can make some use of it at work.

I’m making these for football Sunday I think. Don’t they look just delicious? Also, “doctor’s orders” cracked me up.

Charles put this out there the other day and it’s a great story of people actually transcending their differences. Then you read the comments…

Have listened to this about 30 times in the last 3 days. I love it so much.

My Pops says David Mamet may be too damn smart to make any sense to the average guy. Maybe so. But then it’s our job to translate I think…

This kid’s playing the 9:30 club this weekend. This song is pretty much my exact experience of UGA as well. Warm fuzzy…

Okay, listen to this. It’s good stuff and keeps madness at bay. Also, not hard to look at. Mmmmmm….

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Whir

What’s up Mr. Cheezles? Seriously, I don’t even know what to think of that Obama/Hillary joint “interview.” It’s just gotten so gross and disappointing. Glad to see Kirsten Powers, not someone who would agree with my particular view of policy, call this what it is. It’s all just so insulting. I don’t know about you people but I’m a little tired of being treated like an idiot. Sometimes discretion is the better part of valor, to be sure. But Lord it gets exhausting just rolling your eyes and hoping that things change. I know I did what I could with my vote. I look at what’s happening in Egypt — and our role in that situation — and I’m ashamed of us as a country. Although Charles took exception to that and said not to lump him in with the people who voted this stuff in. That none of it was his idea. But that’s little comfort really…

Anyway, remember that Salon piece from the last post? I forgot to tell you something: the ex, the nerd from Buffalo who ended up with the married lady, blah, blah, blah? Yeah, the genius that she was convinced him while he and I were dating (just one of those fun little tricks women pull when they’re building relationships with men not their husbands) to subscribe to Salon. Edgy news coverage and all that. And being the idiot he was, he actually paid for content. Seriously, I think about stuff like that now and I’m like, whew! Dodged that bullet, man…

I have a liberal “friend” I’m convinced gives me red meat to write about because he knows it’s messed up stuff but he’s too afraid to be honest about it himself because he’ll get kicked out of the clubhouse. It reminds me of this dude I knew once who used to walk with me and Stella through the woods and he let me go first so I would hit all the cobwebs and clear them out for him. Took me about half a walk to figure it out. Such a gentleman. Maybe he was afraid of spiders. Whatever it was it solidified a truth: Hiding behind girls is never sexy…

Anyway, I have other things but I think I’ll just leave you with a few photos from the weekend and head off to dance class.

Saturday was Australia day and an Aussie friend had a do. Seriously, I barely remember it…

But it solidified how little talent I have when it comes to drinking games...

But it solidified how little talent I have when it comes to drinking games…

Man, this was a good time, even if I did spill my first beer all over the nice ladies in front of us out of pure adrenaline trying to deal with the heights thing. It took me a bit but, as usual, facing the fear was the correct and proper course of action. Great game. They won, y’all. Boom.

Totally different experience live.

Totally different experience live.

Rock it out.

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What equals success?

President Grump

President Grump

I’m going to my first Capitals game Sunday. I’m pretty excited about it. I’ve only been to one other hockey game with the nerd from Buffalo I used to date. It was an Atlanta Thrashers game and, I have to say, once you get used to the whole “hockey fans are insane” thing, it’s a great game live. I have a similar relationship with basketball — love it live, bored by it otherwise. Anyway, our seats are pretty much on the ceiling so we should have the entire rink in a singular field of vision. I just hope I don’t get weird with the heights thing. It usually takes me a few minutes to get comfortable…

In case you’re wondering, I’ve lost the desire to slap everyone I see. That’s good because I can’t carry that around with me and I have a sneaking suspicion that, at least for the time being, I’m stuck dealing with some massive stupidity. But then, aren’t we all?

If the decision making before, during, and after the Benghazi attack is insufficient to get anyone fired, what decision in government will ever warrant that consequence? If Democrats on Capitol Hill can’t take off their partisan blinders for one day to attempt to hold people accountable for decision-making that resulted in American deaths at the hands of extremists, and then lying to the public about it, then when will they ever? If Hillary Clinton can exclaim that it doesn’t matter that the administration spent five days talking about a video when the video had nothing to do with it, and everyone on her side applauds, why should she or anyone else ever respond to an accusation with anything but audacious defiance?

What’s fascinating is what my Pops calls the “Clinton two-step.” Wait a few months so you can declare this old news and talk about how we’re moving forward and going to fix it all right up. And if you can’t move forward from my crap behavior and gross negligence, the fault lies with you. (Funny, I’ve just had a personal situation that mirrors this almost exactly in spirit.) But here’s why it makes a difference Madam Secretary: how do you know what to fix if you don’t know what’s broken? Or, probably more accurately, on both the world stage and in my personal situation, if you won’t ADMIT what’s broken. Think about it for a minute. You’ll get there.

Anyhoo, maybe this is true. But they’re going to try to destroy him over the next few years. Yes, this is your four more years kids. Character assassination and a bumbling policy in the Middle East. As Charles mentioned earlier he heard on the radio, “What if Nixon was like, ‘What’s the difference if it was a planned break-in of the DNC headquarters or just some guys walking down the street who wanted to break into an office?'” Sure. So, I’ll be saying thanks again you foolish, foolish children. Party on.

I do like the state. For stuff like this.

Also, just remember, we used to have this lady. I have a hard time hearing “What difference does it make?!?!” coming out of her mouth…

Remember that monastery where Mom got a bunch of coffee for us all at Xmas? Yeah, they’re pretty cool there.

Okay Miley Cyrus, mad respect. Chick’s got some pipes man…

I will always maintain that being good at some discipline, even a very hard discipline, does not automatically make you a genius. You signed up with a crew that really doesn’t care if you own your work. I’m having a hard time feeling bad for you. The truly intelligent would have seen this coming…

Speaking of genius. “You’re… You’re what you are. You’re what you always have been: Dumb and arrogantly so.” My friend Charles said the #salonpitches at the Twitchy site had him peeing a little.

Long but good read. I try every day to smooth these angry northerners out. It makes me sad when my fellow Southerners become what they behold instead of sharing the gentility.

Met some friends here the other night and one of them snapped a photo I stole because this is actually the first place I ate anywhere in DC. That’s a memory to save.

775278_461485177251717_1049248124_o

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Apricot scarf

So seriously, I’m battling the urge to really, really just start going full on “Over it man” mode. The problem with this, for me, is that once it’s there, it’s biting, harsh, and I say things that I can never take back. Because they are intended to disembowel. Metaphorically, of course. And I’m there and I’m struggling with it. I told my friend Charles about it, and how I was like fighting the urge to just start doing the Batman slap to people left and right. You know the one:

304201_410739499007015_1912209642_n

I mean, it’s bad enough that people have to be stupid and willing to pass the ignorance on, but then they want to be all mean and self-righteous about it, too. Like for the love of God, you have zero self-awareness don’t you, imbecile? Like this supreme waste of perfectly good eyeball movement here. Like, I want the 10 seconds it took me to read this back. You brought nothing good into my life. And then I remember…I don’t want to be the kind of kid that wishes people would die in car accidents and whatnot because I’m not getting what I want from some ridiculous thing that, let’s face it, I probably won’t want tomorrow. And then Charles just threw it all into perspective when he said: “Yeah, you remind me of that Chappelle show skit with the black white supremacist. ‘If you have hate in your heart, let it out.'”

Good point. Time to check that.

Speaking of…

I vote for Prince. For the float-down from the basketball net alone. And the fact that they never changed clothes…

I’m required to love this because of what I do for a living. I love it on principle because of who I am.

Wonder why Rahm gave this fight up?

I liked this. It reminded me of those boys with the shaggy haircuts round about 1964…

Helpful.

This is excellent. He reminds me of my ex-boyfriend. Not physically really, but definitely his awkwardness and his manner of speech. I found it endearing. Too bad it also apparently meant easily manipulated…

Pretty awesome stuff here…. It goes from being a pop song to kind of a folky thing happening in there…

This one goes out to the painfully annoyingly self-absorbed that I’ve had, through no desire of my own, the unmitigated displeasure of becoming aware of over the last year or so. Ugh. So looking forward to being rid of that shallow little insubstantial bubble of hot air. Another ex had a thing for this song. He also really loved the concept of being “high-handed” and was enamored of the word “ribald.” He was weird.

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Sunday Sunday SUNDAY!

Before we begin, there’s something very important I must tell you: Lawry’s Seasoned Salt is really, really good on hard-boiled eggs. Remember it.

I’m writing today because I won’t be tomorrow and sometimes I just like to write if I find funny things or have amazingly PROFOUND thoughts that may help the world navigate this boat through the turbulent waters of humanity! (heh). Also, the Falcons play today and I’m excited.

On a seemingly unrelated (but not totally since I’m sure it’s what I’ll be having later) note, here’s what I love about Blue Moons — they never, EVER, give me hangovers. I don’t know if that’s because I can only drink like 3 before I hear myself slurring and saying inappropriate things or because the orange slice as condiment is hydrating. Whatever it is, they are the wheaty jelly to my body chemistry roll. I’ve also really been enjoying Leinenkugel’s Berry Weiss of late. Clearly I like the wheat and fruit rather than a ton of barley and hops. I remember when I met my Uncle at a bar in Germany — where I was traveling and he was stationed at the time — we had a very black, very stouty German beer. I drank it but have never become a fan. I don’t know why I mention it except that last night, while drinking my Blue Moons, I had some really excellent thoughts because my mind was clear due to not having to chew my beer. One of those thoughts was summed up perfectly by this lady for me this morning and, while I’m sure I’ll write my own words later on down the road if the mood strikes, I’ll just let this speak for now:

Let the sporking commence...

Let the sporking commence…

I like Insane Mom. She cracks me up frequently. Here’s another gem that made me laugh aloud because, really, who hasn’t had the turmoil of dealing with a slutty cat? I know I have. Mine’s more testy than whiny if you know what I mean (and I think you do…):

Screen Shot 2013-01-20 at 10.28.15 AM

A’ight, moving on. Because focusing too much on the ridiculous games of puffed-up children (the ones who need taint sporking), who will, sadly, make some pretty serious mistakes because they believe they have even an inkling about anything other than their own selfish, solipsistic needs, is depressing and dissatisfying and today is a day for Falcons football, as mentioned. So be gone juveniles who bond over a shared need to be angry at the world. Because frankly, you get on my fucking nerves. Also, I don’t find you all that smart. It’s really easy to troll Buzzfeed or Wired or whatever it is you do to find the breaking “hip” thing you’re supposed to like and then “liking it first!” Jesus. Get an organic interest already. It must be exhausting having to like something because you’re “supposed” to like it. I thought only the stereotypical “popular” kids did that. I guess the bitter former nerds do it, too. Man, I hate that I’m back in high school…it’s being remedied…

But here are a few things to consider as you go about this ridiculously beautiful day. My God but I have to just get out and walk around in it…

My Mom added me on G+. I fully expect to be taken to task even more for my foul mouth.

It’s really not that uncommon. You just have to have a sense of humor about it and not act like a dick. Some folks are incapable of either of those. Trust me on that. Cause I know.

Fringe is enjoyable. My friend Bob has been watching from the beginning and she’s like, “It gets weirder. You just have to stick with it.” My response: “Josh Jackson is balls hot. Shouldn’t be too hard to keep watching.”

Um, James McAvoy and Danny Boyle. That’s all I’m saying.

Great article but, on principle, I cannot agree. Props, however, for using quantum physics to deduce the Falcons chances. I may have to start reading this guy regularly…

The NFC’s title match features two top-seeds, as the Falcons host the 49ers. Atlanta, a great city, will see their blackbirds lose. There’s no chance for a club once the fans and media have begun calling it a “team of destiny.” Not kidding. Nothing good has ever come from a bunch of football players thinking that their ultimate victory has been written in the stars. Besides, the many-worlds interpretation of quantum physics suggests that there is no such thing as anyone having a single destiny. According to that theory of ever-expanding universes, we all are creating an infinite number of new destinies for ourselves at any given instant.

So this means that alternate realities may exist where the Falcons’ defense is able halt 49ers quarterback Colin Kaepernick. Perhaps you are living in one of them. In my reality, the star rookie QB has been unstoppable in San Francisco’s throwback option-style offense. Against the Packers last week, Kaepernick was harder to pin down than Schrodinger’s Cat. His devastating pair of long touchdown runs included a 56-yard scamper off an ancient play that guys who played in leather helmets would have called “a keeper.”

Good article. And the other benefit about treating people like human beings is that you don’t suck beyond the telling of it and they don’t feel like crap all the time. I mean, have you ever worked in a place where everyone feels undervalued and insecure? I have. It’s torture being at work under those conditions. Why would you want to foster it?

My Slavic ancestors are calling me home. Expect me to ask you to come along…

So here’s how it’s looking: Deadspin — one of the sites owned by the rapacious and ethically questionable Gawker media group — broke an embarrassing story about a naive, sweet kid who lied because he didn’t know what else to do when he found out he was a dupe. Deadspin probably became aware of this pretty quickly and, instead of quietly reporting that and showing a little class and humanity, began announcing in increasingly vituperative tones, that Te’o MUST HAVE KNOWN because who could possibly be that stupid?! The big-hearted and kind are pretty stupid like that. The cynical of the world have such a hard time believing it (and this is where they get duped. Which is usually pretty funny.). Of course I know I could be wrong — and I’ll cop to that if it turns out he’s an evil mastermind who used the fabrication to advance his career — but I don’t think that’s the case here. Because former Deadspin head guy Will Lietch (a great read back in the Black Table days. One of the first sites I got kind of religious about visiting…) starts his piece on the kerfluffel by basically defending Deadspin. Before anyone has made an accusation. And that tells us all we need to know.

Heh. Jennifer Lawrence is alright in my book.

Find your own music today. You can do it.

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“There is only one way to happiness and that is to cease worrying about things which are beyond the power of our will.”― Epictetus

Hey errbody, you’re doing great today. I got my op-ed done and am awaiting approval so I have a minute. I was going to talk about yet another little heartbreaking exchange but I think I’ll refrain because at some point trying to figure out why a teenager is sassy-talking and prone to thinking they know everything is just an exercise in futility. And that’s pretty much what I’m dealing with. I know this because my 15-year-old nephew posted this to Facebook the other day and I was immediately like, uh…yeah…that’s what I’ve been dealing with, too. And let me tell you something, past high school, that shit is just unacceptable:

Little D said, "I hate bullies" when he posted this. Kinda put all crap into perspective immediately.

Little D said, “I hate bullies” when he posted this. Kinda put all crap into perspective immediately.

I will say one thing more: I’m fully aware that the nastiness stems from feelings of insecurity. The most ridiculous people just want everyone to be as miserable as they are, or have been. David, just remember that. It’s a sad truth but it helps with the empathy thing, and, trust me, you want to continue to feel empathy. I’ve seen what people look like who lose that ability. And I wish I could say everyone grows up at some point. But the truth is, they don’t. So you will likely always know these people. But you MUST learn to mitigate their effect on you. It’s crucial. Trust me, cause I know. Also, as a related (but not obviously related) note, pretty sure that if the ability to accept responsibility and apologize for bad behavior is a difficulty for you, we won’t ultimately be able to connect. Because adults know how to do that and I’ve no interest in playing with perpetual teenagers. (see photo above)

Whew let’s just move on from there to better things that may elicit some more interesting and joyful reactions…

I’ll make it to an inauguration in this town at some point. This weekend will not be that inauguration. I’ll be watching football with a friend Sunday — a Democrat — who will be, as he says, “suiting up” for an event following the Falcons’ (I hope) drubbing of the 49ers. I, too, will be dressing up. For an anti-inauguration party. Beyond that, I think I’ll be sticking close to home this weekend. It’s not that I hope for the worst. It’s just that I’m not sure there’s a whole bunch to celebrate…

I read these two pieces in succession this morning. First this one. Next this one. which led to a discussion of the Tu quoque fallacy on Facebook, really for the 2nd time in as many days for me. It’s fascinating stuff. But sort of exhausting, too.

Seriously Phil, get it together.

This was a good read.

So, wait a minute…caring about people and treating them kindly actually facilitates healing? Well that just runs counter to a discussion I had this weekend where the notion was derided as, well, hell, almost evil…

Blergh. Lance Armstrong is not a nice man. Do not be fooled. His confession does not make him a nice man. He’s a certifiable jerk and will continue to be until we all start ignoring him and subject him to public opprobrium. Maybe then, if he apologizes and really works to help with young kids that have self-esteem issues or something, I’ll say he’s repentant. But not until then.

I know it makes me a RIGHT-WING CRAZY to read this but I think it’s fascinating. Man, Google reps are really skimming the bottom of the barrel these days since falling out of favor with big centralized government lovers. The singularity as a concept is just kind of electrifying…

The chicken liver thing looks good but I’ve been itching to make some chicken salad — I love it and my current recipe is pretty good — but adding white wine!? Oh joy!!!

Heh. Tom Branson cracks me up.

For grandpa. I really think it will be a shame if one of the siblings or cousins doesn’t learn how to make wine in our elder years…

I’m going to start watching this this weekend. Why in the name of all good things have I never bothered to watch before? It looks amazing…

Pretty well obsessed with this song at the moment.

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I'm thinking of new frames for my glasses and I kind of love these...thoughts?

I’m thinking of new frames for my glasses and I kind of love these…thoughts?

Hey y’all. Everyone keeps telling me to watch Happy Endings. One guy on Facebook was like — “you’re not doing your life right if you’re not watching this show.” Um, k. But haven’t we had this EXACT set up like 8000x before? Friends? How I met Your Mother? Hell, Cheers, Taxi? Far be it from me to trust without verifying so I’ll give it a whirl. But seriously, give me more It’s Always Sunny…, or Game of Thrones, or even 30 Rock. We just may have reached our Absolute Threshold to care about a group of 20-something friends in the big, big city. I know my brain is barely sparking at the idea. But I’ll give it a shot. Pretty sure I’ll get bored and start trying to find streams online for other things or getting excited about stuff like this:

So, this just looks creepy-tastic. And after all my harrumphing about horror films, I’m going to promote the ice-queen Nicole Kidman as a reported murderess mama. But this just looks good. And Matthew Goode just has this mouth on him that I want to do things to. Naughty things.

Funny story: someone kind of gave me the thumbs up last night because I finally straight up went off and said a bunch of stuff that I’ve been hesitant to say for a long time about some personal stuff that you people don’t need to know about. But here’s the funny part: growing up, I was told time and time and time and time again that I needed to learn tact. And I’m pretty sure most of the people that know me now think I’m lippy to the point of distraction. So…I’m not sure what the disconnect is or if there is one. I just know that when I’m cursing a blue streak and raging like a wounded animal, I don’t really feel like I’m being the best person I can be. But I won’t lie about the cathartic thing. It is a release…I think this is why I play sports and dance. I can work some of that stuff out physically without calling people motherf***ers. Which I’m pretty sure came out of my mouth in flames last night. So ladylike…It was kinda like this:

So, does anyone else think that the fact that Obama is going to have kids standing behind the podium tomorrow — kids who wrote letters to the White House following the Newtown shootings talking about how sad they were, etc. — while he unveils his gun control measures is something that would have fit in perfectly in this movie?

Heh. The lie of the year turned out to be true. Shocking. [Was just informed that the Chrysler GM sent an email to employees saying, oh yeah, we’re going to be building there to sell LOCALLY. Anything other than those EXACT words would be an inaccurate statement. LIE OF THE YEAR. Sorry Corey. Love you, but still call bullshit…]

Captain Underpants rules the school.

Heh. “Is there a single person among us who has not, in one way or another, become obscenely rich and successful through the repeated use of performance-enhancing drugs?” I get so mad when I see the movie Dodgeball now and I’m like, Peter, just finish your drink…

Giant wishes man. Publix is a joyous shopping experience and I miss it every day…

Nice. Variations on this staple are always appreciated. And this is pretty much the recipe I use but I’m lazier about the dumplings…I tend to go with Bisquick. I know. Don’t judge.

Interesting…

Man, thank God! I was actually starting to worry that we had become Toon Town and Wile E. Coyote was going to be nominated next Secretary of the Treasury…

Google, government regulation is not your friend…

Can’t decide if I like this…

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