Pro

Hi there. I’m busy folks so there’s not much to say. Sorta dealing with the knowledge that there are people in the world who, for reasons I guess make sense from a practical perspective to them, will do things to make ya feel kinda bad. Yeah, whatever. I’m breaking up with people left and right today. I’m just not into all the drama trauma of territorial pissings and unsolicited “information sharing” to the degree that it’s causing problems in my life. Tell you what: live with your choices and mess with your own heads. I’m tired of caring and am certainly not interested in relying on people who have other agendas when it comes to being a friend. Peace.

And, that’s all I’ve got today for real. I could talk Obamacare and how I agree with George Will and I think the decision yesterday just got Romney elected; and I could talk about wiretaps that could become public record and how, if sanctioning of Fast & Furious goes high enough, how I agree with the coach when he said: “Well that would seem to be a BFD. Maybe Obama can make shirts about that too.”; or I could talk about how I’m actually nervous about playing softball in this ridiculous heat. 110 degrees with the heat index? Come on man.

But I’ll save all that. There will be plenty of time to discuss the political stuff as we move forward into November and as for the heat — hopefully this will be a freak wave and we can get back to normal for this time of year. 82 degrees will feel pretty nice after all this. And I have some plans for the holiday so things will be okay by next week. Bump all you trouble makers.

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The new truth

In the interest of pissing off the feminists — because that’s funny to me — here’s a quote from a friend. Who’s a guy! I know, right? Men are evil. And hilarious.

“I’m really sorry you’re on your period. Believe me, we all are. But if you just take some Midol, you might not bitch quite so much. Perhaps we can hide it in a piece of cheese for you…”

Anyway, that’s really all I have for today. It’s been a few busy days at work for me and I’m trying to get ready to leave town in a couple of weeks so it’s busy at home, too. And I moved offices — just a few doors down the hall and it’s probably going to be slightly quieter — but only slightly — and that’s likely a good. I need to start separating some of my business from my personal. Sometimes difficult in a small office.

Anyway, I just have a few links for you with no real comments. I’m kind of bummed out because I recently found out that someone I know has apparently become something of an asshole. I can’t even — and y’all know this is rare for me — describe it further. That is the best, most accurate description. And all because being an asshole apparently gets you things. Who knew?

Anyway, links for you. Enjoy them. I’m trying to forget about asshole-ish-ness and narcissism and look forward to things like a softball game Friday, a pub crawl Saturday, a brunch date Sunday etc. I’m aware that there are good things in my life, things to look forward to: people who like to laugh; handsome men interested in you just because they like you, not because you can provide them with …Jesus, I don’t know…whatever it is opportunists are actually after; cocktails on the beach; laps in a friend’s pool; pleasant and hilarious conversation where everyone learns a little something; and other things that are real and simple and fine. I’ve just been looking at other things for a little while now and, well, I’m having to shake off the blergh of all that. Pops says, “You have to separate yourself from it Sarah. Otherwise you make excuses and accommodations and that doesn’t do any good for anyone.” Sure, I get that. Wish it didn’t make me question some basic truths about things. Like what actually leads to happiness and if self-interestedness is actually more fruitful than being there for others. Meh. No worries. Just a turning away from the negative. It’ll be okay. No, it’ll be a good.

I kind of love this.

A friend of mine is dealing with all this crap. This guy seriously needs his ass kicked. Yeah, I said it.

Ahahahahahaha! Awesome.

I guess it’s okay to like Rubio now. Jon Stewart said so.

Heh.

I wonder if Holder will pay his buddy back for making him the scapegoat…

If I’m lucky enough to have some little jawas, this will be on the car.

My favorite chef talks about my favorite fruit. Seriously, Pops always grew these in our garden and we used to eat them raw with salt and pepper as part of a meal. I still use them this way as a side dish today. I enjoy low-maintenance, especially in cooking.

I’m revisiting some music I love. They both mean something to me right now…

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Flipping the mode of comparison

Holy cow, I have had a revelation! I went to my Thursday night dance class — a physical experience that is almost religious in nature and having the added benefit of keeping my body fairly tight. Have you seen what ballet does for the butt? It’s a good — and when I came a home a number of cool things went down: 1. Z was waiting by the door. Usually I have to wander around the block calling him before he comes down from whatever roof or out from under whatever porch he’s chilling in. 2. My friend Ashley and I had a phone date and that was nice. It’s been a long time since I’ve had a female friend who had a similar outlook on things, i.e. we prefer the company of men to women. She likes to text me sometimes and just say “bitches be crazy.” And I get that. But more on that in a few… and 3. As I was farting around on the interwebz I discovered something that gave me the insight and clarity I needed to finally just cap something that needed to be capped, at least for the time being and the discernible future. Sorry to be cryptic, but it’s impolite to reveal too much in these matters since I have a fairly strict “don’t be a bitch” rule I try to live by. What did I discover? Knowledge my friends. The knowledge that there are women in the world who will do anything to keep the interest of their man, up to and including trying to be someone else. Holy Christ, it was a moment of uncomfortable “ah-ha.” And then — well, kind of a numb sadness I guess. But not for me. Oh no — for me it was a “Whew. If anyone ever made me feel like I needed to spin my wheels that much just to keep them interested I’d be exhausted, week 1.” Followed by: “Man, I wonder if that’s really what it takes — buying, negotiating, stressing, flattering, etc…?” Followed by: “Well if it is, I’d be terrible at it, and so things are as they should be.”

Now, don’t get me wrong — I like for a man to know how much I like him. I just prefer to show them in ways that are…um…other?…than ones involving constant, unfinished, grand, sweeping efforts to impress and dazzle. Because after a while, spinning those wheels does get exhausting and you begin to wonder if it’s worth it. And he starts to wonder why you’re not working as hard for his attention any more. And then you both get resentful because things have changed …

Ah well. Knowledge is power, and really that’s all I’ve ever needed to progress (we like that word, yes? Progressive. It resonates.) forward — a little knowledge. A little power. A little more understanding that I had no desire to engage in — nor did I see the benefit of and in fact see the future disaster that comes with — wheel spinning. But I suppose it’s fun while it lasts. Because, hey, some bitches be crazy. But here’s a secret ladies: some dudes want you to be. But not the good ones.

Best epiphany ever.

And now, because it’s actually fairly relevant, another excellent conversation with The Coach from a few days ago:

Charles: Want to see the stupidest thing I’ve read in a while?
1:50 PM me: yes i do
Charles: Ok
So this is a friend of a friend
Posting to Facebook
“I have a very serious request. If you want to not be unfriended by me, you are to never mention god or jesus on any post that I start. I am violently opposed to any form of religion and will not tolerate such stupidity as “god loves you” or praise to jesus” By the way the lower case letters are deliberate. Now, on your posts, of course say anything you want, preach a sermon, but don’t get my temper up by linking any type religion to me personally. Love all of youbut that is something i will not put up with even from my sister.
I am not gonna try to change you so don’t try to change me. Pick someone else who doesn’t have a degree in Philosophy. I also do not want to argue the issue, just respect my right to enjoy freedom from religion.
Putting on my helmit and bullet proof vest.”
1:51 PM And then he followed it up with this: “As the smartest man I ever studied under, Dr. Munster, head of the Philosophy Dept at Ga. State really summed it up for me many years ago. He said, goodness, kindness, love, tolerance, and morality have nothing to do with religion. Actually religion could be more accurately linked to, hatred, racism, intolerance, violence and many other evil concepts.”
1:53 PM me: oh for the love of God
i absolutely adore people that misunderstand that religion is philosophy
and vice versa
at least at its inception
1:54 PM Charles: I like how he talks like just because he has a degree in philosophy that he’s automatically smarter than everyone
And proceeds to misspell the word helmet
Also
1:55 PM Getting a degree in philosophy is NOT that hard
me: no it’s not. also, the religion dept. and philosophy dept. were located in the same building at UGA
for a reason
Charles: Right
1:56 PM me: [redacted]
it’s more anti God than it is pro reason
Charles: What an asshat
Yeah
Like, that’s the most intolerant thing I’ve read in a while
If you mention God, I’m unfriending you
Even if you’re my sister
1:57 PM I mean, replace his atheism with any religion
And he’s a fundamentalist bigot
“If you imply that Jesus isn’t the son of God, I’m unfriending you.”
1:58 PM “If you don’t accept Allah as the one true God and Muhammad as his prophet, I’m unfriending you.”
me: pretty much
also, what’s with the need to be so far away from it that you can’t entertain it in your comment stream?
i mean, what happened to this guy that made his rage so close to the surface on this issue?
1:59 PM i mean, i’m not saying it’s wrong to do that
i have to put distance between myself and things
but i usually know why
Charles: Clearly it’s because he’s smarter than everyone around him
And can’t handle all the stupidity
me: uh
if you can’t handle it
then you can’t answer it…
Charles: Right
2:00 PM Judging by his profile picture
He’s the stereotypical pseudo-intellectual hipster
Like, I guarantee you that this guy is a Ron Paul supporter
me: heh
2:01 PM not an obama supporter?
i mean, Ron Paul at least is nominally libertarian
i.e. can accept other viewpoints
Charles: Oh
Well sure, Ron Paul
But I’m not talking about Ron Paul
I’m talking about Ron Paul supporters
The kind that flip the eff out when Rand endorses Romney
2:02 PM me: oh yeah
those guys
the fundies
Charles: Yeah
Well, picture this
Dude’s got those plastic rim glasses
Pretty chubby
Balding on top, but still has long hair
2:03 PM there’s nothing okay about not letting it go man
like, your hair has to leave you now
be gracious and let it go
Charles: I can’t tell if he has one of those soul patches
2:04 PM Or if that’s just a chin shadow
me: he sounds hot
2:05 PM Charles: Ha
Oh man
I just looked at his Facebook pictures
But I guess he got rid of his hair
2:06 PM [redacted]
Oh good lord
2:07 PM Do you know [Name of Semi-famous Atlanta band]
me: yes….
i’m afraid now
Charles: Apparently he’s their bass player
2:08 PM me: um
is that cool?
2:09 PM Charles: Behold:[redacted image of said bass player]
me: whoa!
don’t ever do that again
i’m eating
Charles: Haha sorry
me: why is he such a hater i wonder?
tongue in cheek
Charles: Ha
2:10 PM See, what pisses me off
Is the whole thing like “Religion is more related to racism and hatred and other evil things…”
Yeah, because atheism never does anything like that
2:11 PM The atheistic regimes of Nazi Germany, the Soviet Union, Communist China
They all have sterling human rights records
me: but they weren’t stupid
2:12 PM see, believing in the unseen is apparently the baseline measure for intellect
don’t you know that?
so, it doesn’t matter if atheism has overseen horrors
they aren’t mouth breathers. they believe in what they can see and prove.
except string theory and stuff like that
2:13 PM because being smart > being kind
Charles: True
2:14 PM me: except…
being unkind and telling people to slag off your facebook thread if they dare not meet one of your rules
really isn’t all that smart
i bet that guy has loads of friends
Charles: Ha
Well that’s the thing
A handful of people were like “Right on, man!”
2:15 PM What miserable people
me: misery parties with itself
not a party i want an invite to
can you imagine?
this punch isn’t very good
how dare they serve bleu cheese and not havarti?
2:16 PM i hate blended scotch…
this music sucks!!!
blah, blah, blah
Charles: Pretty much
Life is really hard when everything sucks but you

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Walk away

I’m not a quitter. I never have been. There have been times when all I wanted to do was run far, far away from something but my parents taught me early that honoring your commitments — even if it’s a small one or one that matters only to you — is one of the most important things in the world because it strengthens character and provides you the future grit necessary to survive adversity. But I gotta say — and maybe it’s just because I’m from the South — I’ve never had a man cross a room (as it were) to come at me physically while yelling and being verbally aggressive while the other men in the “room” — who are ostensibly friends — stood there and said…nothing. No, “Dude, you need to chill. That’s a girl.” No, “Whoa man, take a step back.” No, “Stop being a complete prick man. You did something shitty to her so why don’t you just let her go and blow it off.” No, none of those things. And, honestly, I don’t know how to be around that anymore. I mean, I’m generally not a fearful type of girl. I grew up with 4 brothers and I know how to scrap if I have to. So, if my instinct is to run to the largest guy in the room and actually ask for protection it’s because I’m confused by the rage I see coming at me and I’m not sure in the moment if I’m prepared to meet it. I feel threatened in other words. And then to be called a coward by the same aggressive man trying to — let’s just call it what it is — pick on a girl. I don’t know. Do I need to honor that? I suppose I will because it feels foreign not to. I think the worst is that I was told that somehow I’m part of the problem, that I’m somehow responsible for the fact that this person seems to have a weird desire to see me cry and publicly humiliated. “We just wish you two didn’t try to kill each other all the time.” Let me clarify: I don’t want to kill him. I want to be left alone. I do not engage him and choose not to speak to him beyond being polite if he addresses me so that I don’t give him a reason to “try to kill me.” And yet he finds a way. So, I accept no responsibility for his behavior. And am saddened that people are confused by what’s happening to the degree that I’m somehow being asked to shoulder some of the weight of the problem. It is not mine and I will not carry it. But I guess I now know I’m on my own. Nothing really different about that I suppose. I’m just tired of crying over assholes. I mean, I don’t think anyone has ever been this tired before…

But this, discovered because someone posted about his roll earlier, made me feel better. I’m not sure why. I think I just relate to the tortured poet-athlete.

And then the Trotter sent this and, given our recent web redesign and future design changes we have planned, made me laugh and feel sorry for our web design contractors.

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Letting go with bourbon

Bourbon cupcake from the Beer, Bourbon, BBQ fest this weekend. Already found a recipe I’m trying. Secret: the bourbon’s in the frosting…

I feel like crying today and I don’t know why. I think it’s because I’m missing everyone I love. I don’t like being away from them although I accept it’s necessary. And sometimes it makes me feel sad. But it’s tempered with the knowledge that the only reason it stings is because there’s love there and, well, that’s just tremendous isn’t it? How lucky I am to be able to have it and give it. And sometimes all those things — all those past hurts and fights and disagreements — I just want to throw out the window and replace them with words of love and joy and future hilarity and cocktails and dancing etc. etc. But people need those blankets of familiarity I guess — those parameters. And so, out of love I will keep them, too. But the minute you’re willing to toss them let me know. Cause they’re heavy and I’m tired of carrying them.

Anyway, I don’t have much except that one of my good friends made me cry Friday because he thinks I’m too judgmental. Meh. I just want better for him than hook ups with hoodrats and I guess that makes him feel pressured. But I won’t stop thinking better of you. Please stop making me cry.

This was a good read on the train out to Arlington and Ashley’s pool yesterday. For obvious reasons. It’s always more complicated than it seems. Always. Once you understand that, things get pretty simple. Weird.

They say that a man is set apart by how he uses “the power which the strong have over the weak . . . the educated over the unlettered. . . . The forbearing or inoffensive use of this power or authority, or a total abstinence from it when the case admits it, will show the gentleman in a plain light. . . . He can not only forgive, he can forget; and he strives for that nobleness and mildness of character which impart sufficient strength to let the past be but the past. A true man of honor feels humbled himself when he cannot help humbling others.”

We have a game tonight on by the Washington Monument. I’m thinking we’ll play since we’ve had to reschedule a few games already and Charles says he may cry if we have to reschedule another. So, unless it’s monsoon time, come see us.

Also, despite not having made one game this year and the fact that apparently no one can beat the Yankees (okay fine Ashley. You win. They are good. Satisfied?), I’m finally getting to go to some baseball games in July. And then I think at least one make-up game in August. All I know is I’m in withdrawal and disoriented…

Ashley’s coming to our tournament in August just to be supportive and look at hot dudes. I told her for $30 you can spend a weekend drinking free beer, eating free food, and talking to cute boys in baseball pants. She signed up immediately and wants to wear her bikini. Love that kid.

I broke this album out last week. Forgot how much I liked it. Have the best tracks to start your week…

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I thank you for the music

The Onion gets it.

Happy Father’s Day pops. You’re the coolest, toughest, kindest, and smartest. I love you.

I post this almost every father’s Day but it is very nearly exactly how I feel about Pops. And so, again…

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You wished me cancer, and misspelled cancer

Ash posted the image above a bit earlier. Man, it’s so true. She and I need to have t-shirts made. Although I look more like i do those things than she does, sometimes, when dressed appropriately or when the Southern accent is in full-form, people are a little surprised by the whiskey and f-bombs.

Anyway, I just have links and diversions today and a thought I’d like to pass along: I work for an organization that is a “First Amendment shop” as we like to say. And one thing I really like about what we do is this basic premise that the First Amendment and the freedoms contained therein serve not to protect consensus thinking and speech, but rather unpopular ideas and voices. People forget that sometimes and we’d do well to remember it.

Alright, I’m maybe going out on The Hill later (Ted’s Bulletin? I don’t know but I like that place a lot…) and then Lynz and I are hitting the National Harbor tomorrow for beer, bourbon and bbq. Seriously, I don’t even know how to be more excited about that latter. Because that’s just a triumvirate of awesome right there. So, while I wait with bated breath for those things, here’s some fun things…

This summer lobster salad with little marinated grape tomatoes is a wonder to behold.

A cure for what ails ya.

Hmmmm. We use one at work — although I’d prefer we all just go remote desktop but there’s some issue with how slow database transactions are on the server without a dedicated VPN line — so this is something to watch.

Ahahahahaha! This would be me at the Weiner Circle…(h/t The Coach.)

Love me some Danny Boyle in general but the fact that he’s channeling Shakespeare? Swoon…

Heh.

My pops taught this discipline to Officer Candidates while he was in the Army. Which I think is really cool and probably explains why he bought me a telescope when I was an itty bit. So he could use it.

Excellent advice. “Then pummel it with the medicine of perspective and objective honesty to starve it and inhibit its growth. Imagine it shrinking smaller and smaller until it’s just a dot, and it disappears.”

46-50 pretty well clinches it for me. No pun intended. (h/t Julie D.)

And in case you need another reason, well…

Frightening and pretty damned amazing.

Finally, take note trolls:

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