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Archive for March, 2006


I hate to admit it, being Catholic and not Hindu, but sometimes I believe in Karma. And when I do, I’m convinced that I must have been a right mean bastard in a former existence. Sometimes the tax man metaphorically comes a knockin’ and there’s nothing left to give. But he takes anyway…

When I was a baby, my brother John (5 years my senior) gazed at me in my high chair as my mother fed me and said, matter of factly, “I knew Lola (names have been changed to protect the, um, innocent…er, the somewhat innocent…) before. But she was a big person…and she was a boy, not a girl.” This actually explains a lot.

My mother tells me that my nephew David, being the sensitive little redhead he is, informed her the other day that he had lived over 300 years, and had lived many lives. And was apparently miserable in every one.

Jesus. I come from a family of mystics. Or really talented storytellers. Here’s hoping that if David and I are indeed paying for past mistakes, we get it right this time.

Happy St. Patrick’s day!

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Obsession sucks. But I’m very good at it…

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My friend “code name Ennui” thinks I just might be the woman for Joaquin Phoenix, despite the fact that he’s famous, rich, talented and can pretty much get all the dark-haired beauties he desires.

But hey, Ennui, you’re from New York and go home frequently. I hear he lives in Tribeca. Hook a sister up…

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Totally forgot about this and then “code-name Ennui” reminded me — For some reason this completely cracked me up, very likely because I love the PBR, we were drinking it this night (it’s deliciously cheap, if not so much deliciously beer), my Dad drank it when he drank beer and the guy who said this is one of those adorable guys who have a sweet edge of upper crust about them. Like they know all about fine wines and where to buy the best docksiders.

So when he (Chip was his be-spectacled name. Doesn’t it just scream J. Crew?), after someone suggested another small round of PBR, says, “Pabst’s Blue Ribbon — my dad called [cans of PBR] ‘baby blues’. Son, go get me a baby blue!” I nearly peed my pants laughing.

I don’t know why. It just struck me as funny.

PBR is offically, for me, now christend Baby Blue. Thanks you straight-laced-but-hiding-a-secret-redneck friend of a friend. You’re alright by me.

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Cheney-ed


Dick is a force to be reckoned with.

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Old dogs, old tricks


This is good old country boy ass-kickin’! I love being from Georgia!

(Taken from the Athens Banner-Herald, 3/8/06)
Regent, neighbor brawl over dogs

By Merritt Melancon | juliana.melancon@onlineathens.com | Story updated at 11:20 PM on Tuesday, March 7, 2006

A neighborhood dispute over barking dogs led to a street brawl Saturday between University System of Georgia Board of Regents member Donald Leebern Jr. and Mason Lewis Bentley, the son of former Athens mayor Upshaw Bentley.

Although the fight sent Mason Bentley to St. Mary’s Hospital emergency room with a broken nose and a punctured and collapsed lung, no charges have been filed against Leebern or Bentley, said Oconee County Sheriff Scott Berry.

“Since the parties were separated when the deputy arrived at the scene, the deputy did not actually see anyone fighting, and we have two conflicting stories about how the fight took place, so it’s up to one of the parties involved to go apply for a warrant in Magistrate Court if they want charges filed,” Berry said.

Leebern and Bentley got into a fistfight on the streets of the Crystal Hills subdivision in Oconee County Saturday afternoon after their dogs started barking at each other. Leeburn said Bentley kept attacking him even while he was trying to leave, while Bentley said he only fought because the 68-year-old Leebern had called him out into the street to settle a score.

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No one’s buying it

Please, don’t procreate unless you can prove it’s not for selfish, self-serving or just downright trendy reasons. The world begs you…

When I was in high school, I used to watch the trends. It never ceased to amaze me the things people would do to convince others, and themselves, that their bulls*!t was true. Getting a bi-level haircut and a pair of Doc Martens to prove punk-rockness. Things like that.

Now, as an adult (even if I don’t always feel like it — thank God!) I’m disturbed how much this type of behavior HASN’T changed. Only now, you see, it’s way more serious because adults, by their very nature, have more influence and power, and therefore more ability to harm and destroy (and love, but that’s a subject for another post). And the trend these days? Pregnancy. Just think about the implications of getting pregnant to prove your maternal or paternal nature. Or to convince everyone that you really are in love! Britney Spears is pregnant again. This is your peer group. Enjoy. I think I’ll hold out a little longer…

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Alright, all I’m saying is that Phillip Seymour Hoffman must have been phenomenal in Capote to beat Joaquin Pheonix as Johnny Cash for Best Actor at last night’s Oscars. I just saw Walk The Line and, despite my obvious bias being the lifelong Johnny Cash fan I am (no, really — my dad listened to his tapes on nearly every road trip we took as a family. I think it may be some of the first music I heard), I was floored at how much the actor became The Man in Black. I hear that Hoffman pulled off this same feat (haven’t seen the movie yet but am looking forward to it; Capote ranks as one of my favorite writers and is in my list of fascinating people).

Also, Joaquin and Johnny Cash are hot. While Phillip Seymour Hoffman has a cuteness about him, Capote?… not so much. I’m so vapid.

Best Oscar moment: After Three 6 Mafia won the Best Original Song category for “It’s Hard Out Here for a Pimp,” they were exuberant on stage and were dressed in (gasp!) jeans and jerseys. Hilarious. Then John Stewart deadpans: “I think it just got a little easier in here for a pimp.” It’s funny because it’s true…

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Happy Friday!

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I love Ash Wednesday — it’s a very mellow, reflective service that reminds us that we have our go ’round here on earth so living in the moment might be a wise choice.
“Remember, man, that you are dust, and unto dust you shall return.” Amen.

Where shall the word be found, where will the word
Resound? Not here, there is not enough silence
Not on the sea or on the islands, not
On the mainland, in the desert or the rain land,
For those who walk in darkness
Both in the day time and in the night time
The right time and the right place are not here
No place of grace for those who avoid the face
No time to rejoice for those who walk among noise and deny the voice

Ash Wednesday ~ T.S. Eliot

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