With thanks to my friend Josh, let’s start with this:
“The society that separates scholars from its warriors will have its thinking done by cowards and its fighting done by fools.” -Thucydides
Alright, so I had a mini-epiphany: much as I would like to be a kinder, sweeter kind of person — that’s the kind of woman that men like, right? — there are just some things that are non-negotiables in terms of behavior and I’m worried this makes me recalcitrant and unforgiving. Here’s what I’m saying, spurred of course by a recent reconnection with the Twerp — DO NOT JUDGE. I was trying to get rid of his number in a massive I-never-talk-to-you contact purge and couldn’t without finally telling him what I thought of his stupid email to my family. Which led to a tiny discussion. And dammit the man makes me question things. And there it is. I’m not proud of it. — I might be kind of mean. It’s troubling. But then it occurred to me: I’m not mean and I know it. I’m selfish and I lack patience. And my choice to deal with the Twerp is perfect proof of that. You don’t have to have patience to deal with a sociopath because they enjoy your frustration. And you can be selfish because a sociopath wouldn’t understand or respect anything else. So dealing with someone like that absolves you of having to do the work of relating. Apparently I’m also lazy. I’m sure my father will raise his hands to heaven and whisper, “Finally” when he reads this. But it’s an uncomfortable realization for me. And I’m working it out…so let’s move along, shall we?
Let’s talk for a minute about negotiating the people in this world who believe they should have what they want for no reason other than they, in their infinite awesomeness, want it. Without being too specific so as to not start a war, let me just say that there is a social contract and a legal framework we live in that prevents you from just having a temper tantrum and disrupting another person’s life because you can’t make your relationships work. I’m sorry you’re unhappy in your marriage but that’s not something I signed up to have to navigate. And if you need my space to fix your life, you’re going to have to do it legally and ethically, and very likely, on my time. I know because I checked. I’m type A like that. I like to be informed. Anyway, wish I wasn’t such a hardass for your sake but I have been tiptoeing around women like you, quite literally, my entire life, and I’m fairly exhausted by the effort. If the men that choose to marry you want to give in to your whims, that’s the decision they make. I’m under no such obligation. So let’s conduct business. But I’ve no interest in the foot-stomping, mail-withholding, passive-aggression.
The other night a friend of mine showed up unexpectedly at a mini-celebration to honor the repeal of prohibition and we discussed the Garner/Ferguson cases because we’re both upper middle-class white kids from Atlanta and we can talk about those things without any real risk to ourselves or others. He lives fairly close to me now in DC and he made a comment, in the course of the conversation, that he admittedly reacts with nervousness when he sees a group of young black kids approaching him on the street. And that informs how he views both what happened in NYC and in Ferguson. That’s all fine and well. But my friend — and I do like this man — tried to apply that same nervousness to me and how I viewed the situation. It was as if anything I said about it was viewed through that same prism — fear of a group of young black guys approaching me on the street. Man did it start to piss me off, and here’s why: I do not have that problem. I see a group of young black guys and I see the kids in my high school, good kids from good families. I rely on my instinct to inform me when there’s danger about. And that’s something that makes the hair go up on the back of my neck because of circumstance, which is informed by things more than just color. So, I guess, if we’re going to talk about these things, and I’m just throwing it out there, be prepared to accept that your biases may not be shared.
Okay and alright then. I’m tired and I want to walk my dog and go to bed. So other stuff and things:
Why are we smearing the CIA over torture you ask? Well I mean… Brennan, at his presser today, impressed me as someone who cares about the work of the agency and also understand the precariousness of the bureaucratic rock/hard place he’s squished between. Those are the people who do the hard jobs in government, if they manage to walk that line. It’s an unsung talent and not one you want everywhere. But sometimes it’s appropriate.
I’m always fascinated by articles that talk about American oil energy production as some kind of market miracle (not that this one does, just that it’s offering something to the mainstream that industry people have been aware of forever I would think). We made the Saudi’s rich on purpose. We conserved. It was a good strategy. And while we enter the market and make everything cheaper, there should be some focus on why we’re having to do this now and what that means for alternative energy. Because oil, unless I misunderstand how it’s harnessed, is not infinite. Its production may be close to that, but we have to be able to get to it. And that’s the issue at hand. On that note, here’s what it’s like elsewhere.
When I’m out and about, I hear people complain about Fox News to the point of mouth foaming. I watch it, along with a lot of other news channels. I find it pretty informative and fair, depending on the show. So, yeah. Think for yourselves kids.
It’s something to think about. Because aren’t we all just venters online anymore?
I like that Ed Henry keeps it real. I think the White House likes it, too, since he gets to travel with them. I have faith Ed will always keep it real.
Benny’s funny. And NR was smart to harness that.
As my friend Michelle said when she posted this, “Have fun!” I LOVE THIS STUFF. It hurts my head but it’s the stuff.
Yeah, we like the cooler climes.
It’s a wardrobe must-have.
The boys disagree, but I see a championship in our future. And I don’t care if that mean girl who tells people not to invite me to parties has a problem with me saying it.
I spent an hour pouring over this, finding the books if I hadn’t read them, and absorbing the first several paragraphs. I offer my favorite to you all, from CS Lewis: “All that is fully real is Heavenly. For all that can be shaken will be shaken and only the unshakable remains.”